Life as it is

After my last post I had a deep thought on life and its change. My mind recalls the things that had been before and the state it is now. It has changed a lot. Either reduced, replaced, added to or forgotten. But what I found myself was still with the same feelings and habits and nature but with better understanding. This understanding though hurts now as the expectations also remains the same as before, but nothing changes without atleast a part of self in the matter as I believe and somehow I learnt to take the truth of things that has changed, the respect for its feelings with the love unchanged. My mind tells me to run away to not be aware of the reality that hurts me and my heart tells me to remain and running is not a solution but a awkward thing to do, after a serious struggle between heart and mind over the changed life for few hours, admits forgotten expectations, longing for the nostalgia, my heart won it over making me enough gentle, patient and more loving to take it right and smile upon and to care more. But the only thing I'm afraid of this is I'm growing good but if the child in me is destroyed by learning to take everything as it comes, I would have nothing to quarrel, nothing to expect, nothing to rely and hence no attachment would remain..