I am an Anti-Everything

I have different tastes, thoughts, concerns even decisions? yes I don't go with the world. And I have never felt bad about that expect for the likes I don't get on facebook because many will not agree to it.. ha ha.. It can also be understood like I have grown up with experiences which makes me think so. And now I think spending 978 crore for a satellite for a research purpose which solves no purpose. That's true. You eat then you clothe then you create a shelter then you decorate it. Its like straightaway doing the decors. Doesn't sound priority to me. I am not against any scientific development but there are a lot of people who starve and thirst in our country. I have seen worst lives.

Today while riding back to my home, waiting in a trafficked signal,  I saw an old man in dirty clothes torn here and there with a plastic baggage beside him was sitting on a stone staring on the ground. I saw something in those eyes, which I cannot explain. Something like when you are a kid and watch pastries through the display of a bakery yearning to eat but no penny even for food, like sitting in a park watching kids playing with their mom but you have none and you couldn't play neither enjoy their playing.. kind of look... which I couldn't forget. What this Chandrayaan2 will mean to him in his life? Will it give him his next meal? Or will it give the love he needed? Or will it be his company till he lives? What is the purpose of Chandrayaan2? I really don't understand.

The Generation Before & After

Its a saturday evening, after work I was riding home saw a 45 years old man in an old cycle which has a broken seat. Its really hard to understand how he manages to sit in that broken seat and peddle for a long distance. How will he feel when he reaches home? How much ache his back will give him?

I remembered a conversation with colleagues when we were in juice shop, we discussed about how our parents were sacrificing so many things for themselves to get us what we need. My mom was a teacher and I remember her searching for a handbag for a very low price after the handbag which she currently uses torn apart that she can use it no more. But now we have too many matching for our dresses. As she was a teacher she would be needing too many sarees, but I never remember her purchasing something for herself. My dad never bought shirts, he cuts the torn collar to make it look decent and wears it. He never changed his worn-out slipper until it really tears apart. Now we are in a comfortable situation and we can satisfy our luxuries as well as our kids was what we are talking. Its true that we have never felt the feeling of sacrificing something for ourselves so we can give that to our children. Then the discussion was concluded because now we are paid surplus and more than one member earns in family which was not the case earlier. But when I saw this man's broken cycle seat, I realized we are not required to sacrifice something to feed our children is because our parents sacrificed theirs and made us stand in the position of being financially comfortable. Still there are so many families, fathers and mothers even children sacrifice something for themselves. It didn't end in the last generation, we feel like its ended because we are now comfortable. Thank you to all the fathers and mothers for all the things you have sacrificed for making us. We owe you everything and it feels bad to understand that when you were young and wanting to have something but didn't have, we can give you back what you have wished for but we can never give the same moment at that age and the happiness you deserved.

I have an enemy in office

I have this particular enemy in office who doesn't want to work and love bucketing superiors to escape and be in safe zone without doing work survived 34 years taking 75 thousand salary per month that could feed 3 families where they literally die working to make a living.  I am so angry at this which I can't stand. I don't talk to her, I don't mind her but whenever I see somebody doing her job I get so so furious. And when I said the prayer 'forgive me as I forgive those who wrong me' I stopped, I realised I didn't do this and I am not able to.

Living Vs Surviving

In office when our workload is less we used to do everything with concentration the observation will be enormous but when we are overloaded we tend to finish this off like grazing the grass. It's the same in living a life. Now I have more work and things to do, so I am grazing failing to observe which is why scribbling something in my blog now become a rare thing. Maybe this a phase where I find no time and there comes a time when I retire and I may search for a zone to talk to someone as all elders feel now. As I am in the customer service job, I meet so many elders eager to speak to me, but do to the next one waiting for me, I tend to avoid conversation which I should not be doing in customer service. So in the family. After growing old and experiencing things I found, "Happy and blessed is the man who finds a job which his soul likes and is near his house". It is not important to earn more, but it is important to stay near the family and do what you like.

The Difference Between Men and Women

Understanding about a particular subject changes with time and it changes much more in a woman's life. I am no exception. During my early days, I used to think men and women have no difference and even I have thought that men are better as I love my dad, he spends more time with me than mom and the way he lives, loves always captured me. Later I grew up to be a woman myself.

On a week off lazy tired Saturday, I woke up late as if I have satisfied all the sleep deprivation accumulated on that week. My husband next to me said he is hungry. Well, me too but to whom I will say. I got up made some tea, by the time I felt getting weak I realized I didn't even take water since I woke up. I was drinking water he was brushing. Gave him some tea and made the breakfast ready by the time he finished his morning call, my tea went cold. One of my favorite thing to do in the morning is dipping a biscuit and drinking the tea. That happens only in weekend and only when the tea is hot. Sipping the cold tea I realized that this is the difference between men and women. My mom has loved me in a way which is painful for her and never showed up. Understanding women are difficult and experiencing her love is life and living under her care is a blessing.!!